Warning: Bodily fluids
Jul. 29th, 2006 12:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sildil...the next morning Brian caught the alarm just before it went off. He didn’t want to wake Justin up. Brian padded into the bathroom. He let out a sigh of relief as a long stream of urine splashed into the bowl. He couldn’t remember when was the last time he went. Judging from the stream it had been quite a while...
Do I really want to know this?
I mean, I'm all for messy sex but this is just a tadge too much information...
Do I really want to know this?
I mean, I'm all for messy sex but this is just a tadge too much information...
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 12:53 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 01:23 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 01:53 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 01:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:06 pm (UTC)Damn, had to use boring icon. I so need a peeing Brian one now...
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:06 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:08 pm (UTC)What is it about fics that insist on telling us about how, upon waking, Brian and/or Justin need to pee? WE ALL DO, but so what?
Okay, if they're in the middle of an argument, and "Brian muttered, "I need to pee," Stomped to bathroom, and scowled scarily at the yellow liquid hitting the water of the toilet..." Not elegant, but it serves its purpose, y'know?
Or, "Upon waking, our boys were in the midst of a furious makeout session when Justin whimpered. 'I know, I'm just that good,' Brian snickered. 'No I gotta pee!' Justin yelled and pulled away. 'Beat ya to it!?' Brian yelled back, pulled away and ran to the head, whipping out his dick an dstarting to go. 'Briaaaaaan!' justin whinged, chasing him in, unable to scowl at the sight of the magnificence that is his lover's dick! Then he whipped out his own and there piss joined as one just as they are and tehy laughed!!"
Okay, so it's pretty bad, but at least the urine contributes in some way to the overall story line, such as it is.
And, yeah, I did read one the other day that had B/J wake up and discuss their plans for the day over a piss in the bathroom.
I kept thinking, couldn't they just do this over coffee like normal fic?
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:14 pm (UTC)And the next thing, he dipped in a steri stick and found he was +++ for sugar. Obviously, he'd bonked Justin one too many times last night. Then he realised (with mounting horror) that he couldn't finish the last few drops off and that maybe his prostate was enlarged. OMG!! He'd have to get onto the saw pimento straight away. Wiping his brow (with the clean hand) he peered into the toilet bowl and observed a gentle mist rising off the urine just like clouds in a rainforest when the day dawned. Any minute now monkeys would start swinging from the bathroom lights and parrots would break into song.
Ahem. This extract was brought to you by 'The Society for the Abolition of Discretion in Literature', more commonly known as Pissed Off.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:20 pm (UTC)I think it's supposed to remind us that this IS a REAL MAN we are talking about, and REAL MEN go for a piss of course, and stand there thinking about it casually.
I mean, if it were a girrrl, it would be just....wrong, wouldn't it?
'...Brianetta went to the bathroom. She hadn't had a pee in a long time and as she sat there on the loo, staring at the tiles opposite, she was amazed at just how much did come out. 'Hmmm, water retention,' she thought, 'must be that time of the month already.'...'
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:21 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:23 pm (UTC)What I find is how scarily easy it is to write that stuff!
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:23 pm (UTC)I think it was the ballerina fic that did it for me.
If you do decide to branch out into LOTR, though, I can hook ya up.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:24 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 02:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 03:26 pm (UTC)I think it really says something about that fic that I, who reads EVERY QAF FIC IN THE UNIVERSE couldn't read past Ch 1. OMG, the sheer badness, it was sooooo bad.
If you do decide to branch out into LOTR, though, I can hook ya up.
I'll let
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 03:41 pm (UTC)Bwhahahahahha or Ewwwww, I can't decide... but, OMG, please don't share that with the other dark side of the fandom, next thing you know they'll need to separate the men from the women by having them hold off the bathroom until after the coffee and a cigarette.
Oh, dear, I probably shouldn't have gone there.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 03:44 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 03:55 pm (UTC)Oh, geez...that icon...
Yes, ballerina was verrah bad. Sil and I read it together on YIM and cried with laughter.
I'm going to friend you so I can read the rest of your fic reviews.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 04:01 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 04:17 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 04:18 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 04:26 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 04:52 pm (UTC)EWWW!!
Date: 2006-07-29 05:08 pm (UTC)And thank you all for making me laugh so hard I now have a headache! OMG!
I have never looked around in the QAF fandom yet and now I'm not sure I want to, lol.
Re: EWWW!!
Date: 2006-07-29 05:12 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 05:32 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 05:34 pm (UTC)Yech. Not even Brian can make peeing sexy. Therefore, no-one can.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 05:35 pm (UTC)*in hysterics at own typo*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 05:47 pm (UTC)Re: EWWW!!
Date: 2006-07-29 05:47 pm (UTC)Re: EWWW!!
Date: 2006-07-29 05:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 05:49 pm (UTC)Oh yeah, what a DREADFUL thought!
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 05:49 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 07:04 pm (UTC)Better to be pissed off than pissed on. Might drown in this case. LOL
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 07:12 pm (UTC)GAAAAAAH.
*eyebleach*
*brainbleach*
We really didn't need that, but damn, it's funny in it's own dreadful way. ;)
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 09:38 pm (UTC)THE BEST TYPO EVER!
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 10:52 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 10:53 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 10:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 11:08 pm (UTC)And I had second thoughts about Erestor thinking he needs to piss?
That's just...just... TMI.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-29 11:15 pm (UTC)Hence my icon!
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-30 12:33 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-30 09:53 am (UTC)